My Obvious "Secret"

I was trying to keep things quiet until after girls' camp (seeing as how it was against the rules for someone in my condition to go, and everyone kept telling me they'd send me home if they knew). It was a little difficult though because my condition was getting to be quite obvious.
I'M PREGNANT!
I'm 20 weeks along, and due the beginning of January. So if you haven't seen me lately with my blossoming bulge, now you know.

I Survived Girl's Camp

Me deciding to try a hot dog after going at least 15 years without one. I knew John wouldn't believe me, so I took a picture. I spit it out. I guess when you're camping things just look tastier.

Some of the Young Women waiting for the gus to go home.

Our wonderful hike.

I went to Girls' Camp last week. People ask how it was, and I'm not sure how to respond. Everything that I wanted it to be for the girls, it was. We were having some problems among them, and several weren't going to come. I prayed really hard about everyone being there because I felt that it was the place where healing would take place. All 28 girls went. All of them. I also had a devotional that I was really concerned about getting right (thank you to everyone who gave me stories), and the week before we went, there were so many instances where people made comments, and they were exactly the words I needed to use. I also felt impressed, back in February, to write a song for camp. I have never written a song in my life. But through a lot of prayer, I was able to get it done. I had 5 girls sing it with me, and it was such an overwhelming feeling to hear their beautiful voices singing about the truths that God wanted them to know in their hearts. It was another one of those experiences where if God wants me to do something, I can do it.

I am so grateful that I can turn to the Lord, and ask him for help in the details of what he wants me to do. I'm continually in awe of what a powerful instrument I can be when I decide that I will do whatever the Lord wants me to do. I fully believe that all things are possible when we work together with the Lord to do His will. I'm so grateful for everyone who watched my kids. I'm grateful for the other leaders who sacrificed so much to be up there with these precious girls. The Lord loves each one of them so much, and that love is reflected in the love that emanates from their leaders. They give so much and endure so much because they love them and want them to have happiness in their life. It is just amazing.

But aside from all the good experiences and love that was shared, it was still Girls' Camp. I didn't shower for the whole week (no hot water). I washed my hair three times when I got home and it still stunk. It was super hot. There were lots of bugs. I had to walk uphill to the "biffy" (who came up with that word) at least once every hour. I didn't get to see my sweet little kids. And I missed John. But it was still worth it.

Ugh...

Today is one of those days where I feel thoroughly inadequate for what is required of me. Who am I for the Lord to trust me with some of these things? I'm so grateful though, to have the Spirit to guide me as I make difficult decisions. I don't know how I would function otherwise. I just have to follow it and trust that I am doing the right thing. But still, sometimes there is just so much pressure.

The Last 30 Days

It's been a month since I've written. It has been on the list of things to do, but things have been crazy. Here is a brief glimpse of what we've been up to.....

Annual Rodeo with the Grands:
So Cute. My parents are the best.


Trip to California with the Olsens
This was so much fun. Heather, Aaron, and Hallie came, as well as my parents, Dustin, and Chelsey. I love my family. We went to the beach, Seaworld, shopping, played cards, did a little RockBand, went to a baseball game, drove an hour to the temple to find out it was closed, and had a ton of fun. Family, immediate and extended, is the the thing that brings me the most joy in life.


Macy Turned 1
Macy is walking, has 3 teeth, is our smallest baby (although the doctor said he thought she should be half her size because I was so short), loves to eat, can say "doggie", likes to open the wipes and stick toys inside, cries when her Daddy leaves for work, is very dramatic (John thinks we're in for it), loves her new baby doll from Grandma (originally only intended for Hallie and Avery, but her pout made Grandma feel so bad she bought her one too), starts to boogie whenever she hears music, and likes to snuggle.

The Fourth
Lots of fun with parades, fireworks, boating, and family. And yes, the picture of Carston with the headphones is exactly like last year's. He's doing better though, we didn't have to sit in the car :)

7 Years-And Itch Free
John and I had our 7 year anniversary. There are some emotions so deep and complex that attempts to put them into words will always leave you feeling unsatisfied, sometimes there are no words adequate enough. That is how I feel when I think about John.

I love you.

Avery is Three
Once again, I went a little crazy with the party. We had a princess and Knight party, and the best part for Avery was that everybody could come. Thanks to my mom who found the boxes for the castle the night before. It was really fun. It is hard to resist doing things when you know it will make your kids so happy. Here's a little info on Aves: She lives in her own world, John says she's really a girl now (when I asked him what he meant by that, he said he is understanding her less and less), she loves princesses-obviously, she always wants to have her hair down, and wear pink shirts with pink shorts, she knows uppercase and lowercase and their sounds (she couldn't get enough of the lowercase letters when they became the "babies" to the uppercases), she loves to color, she'll eat anything, and snuggles are the best part of her day.

Spontaneous Decision

I was laughing the whole time at the salon. No one knew I was there or what I was doing. I feel like a little kid who found the scissors and cut off their own ponytail, just waiting for someone to discover what they've done. I guess I'll see tomorrow if I will be living in regret.

Playing Catch-Up

Heather has been pestering me for new pictures. What can I say, life is busy. I keep thinking, "Okay, this week is pretty full, but if I get through it, then next week should be a little more laid back." That doesn't seem to be happening. I'm enjoying it though, so no complaints. Here are a few of the things that have been keeping me from blogging.

1. Our friends Todd and Gina, who have been in Alabama for the last three years, came out to visit. We had fun hanging out with them whenever they could. We had a bunch of people over for the day, set up two Wii game systems, and just kind of went crazy. This is John doing the hula hoop on the Wii Fit game. I totally could have beat his record if I didn't have to stop because of all his cat calls when I started swinging my hips. It was totally a plot to take out the competition :)

2. Carston FINALLY started T-Ball. He has been looking forward to this for years. He is obsessed with baseball. I was the big nerd mom who took my camera and video camera to his practice. That's right, it wasn't his game, but his first practice :) John is his coach, so there is an added bonus of something fun to watch. If you haven't been to a T-Ball game, you are missing out. All the kids race to get the ball, form a big dog-pile, and then fight to be the one who throws it to first base. They all hit the ball, and then move a base with each hit. Carston was disappointed with that part because that means he can't hit a home run :) Everyone was so nice to come to his game. Oh yeah, when they were getting ready to go to practice, Carston asked John if they were going to be on TV :)














3. Carston turned 5! I feel so old. There is something about that age that just officially turns your little kid into simply a kid-with no little attached. He wanted a pirate party so that is what we did. John and I really got into planning the party. I went dumpster diving for the first time so I could get the boxes to make the boats. I told John I needed something to put the sand in (digging for chocolate coins) so he made a sandbox the night before the party. We are a little silly, but it was fun to do it. I guess I'm feeling creativity withdrawals since most of the projects in the house are done :) So, we dug for treasure, had cannonball fights, walked the plank,did pin the treasure chest on the "X", and had a treasure hunt with a pinata at the end. It was a pretty fun party. Much better than the last one I did (which was a total bust!)

How old is she?

Avery asked if she could play the Leapster, but I told her it was time to go to bed.
"Well, then I want to play it tomorrow."
"Tomorrow is Sunday, so you can't play tomorrow, you'll have to wait until Monday."
"Well, if you don't let me play the Leapster, then I'm not going to live here anymore."

She is TWO! Where did she even come up with that????

Graduation

Carston had his preschool graduation last night. It was so fun to watch him. I felt a little silly over how much I enjoyed watching his every move. He was very serious about the whole thing. He tried so hard not to laugh during the "Apples and Bananas" song even though he thought it was so funny! The best part though was the unique award that his teacher gave him. She thought of something special for each kid. Some got "Friendliest" or "Good Leader" or "Always Smiling" I laughed out loud when she read Carston's....."Overcoming Fears" It was totally perfect! The day before she had sent home a paper with two columns. One indicated their initial assessment when preschool started, and the other one was for what they knew now. All of Carston's for the initial assessment had a question mark because he wouldn't say ONE word to her when we went. So I guess he overcame his fear of talking to his teacher. He also went through a period where he didn't want to go to school because of the wind. So that would be fear number two. He also had to learn to go to preschool even if his cousin we carpooled with wasn't going. Number three. He also started out with a fear of not being able to write his letters exactly perfect, to the point where he would start to cry and give up (example being the lines on a "E" all had to be EXACTLY the same length). That would be number four. I'm sure there were plenty more, but those are the ones that come to mind. Carston is such a great kid. I love being his mom, and I am so proud of him for all that he has learned from preschool!

Am I really THAT old?

So this post is all about me. I got a new calling on Sunday. I was the Beehive Advisor for the last few months. When the Bishop said he wanted to meet with me, I thought I was so smart and I knew what calling he would give me. The 1st counselor is moving next month, so I figured that would be the new call. So anyway, he came over on Monday night, and when he said the call was about the Young Women's, I couldn't help but blurt out, "Oh, I totally called it!" with a big stupid grin on my face. He looked at me a little weird, and then he asked me if I would be the President. So of course I had to ask if he was joking. He was kind 0f nodding his head, so I thought he was playing a cruel joke. But he quickly realized what he was doing and shook his head no to indicate he was indeed serious. So now I have to ask, am I seriously THAT old? I really feel like I was in Young Women's just a few years ago. I guess I like to think of myself as a young newlywed, but apparently I've been living a fantasy. So yeah, I'm old and mature. And I felt like an imposter whenever I have to stand up and be in charge. Seriously, I still buy my clothes in the same section as all these girls. I might accidently show up for an activity with a matching outfit and completely traumatize some poor young woman who will be so embarrassed to be wearing the same thing as some OLD LADY!

On a more serious note, I am very humbled to have such a responsibility. I kind of broke down the first few days as I struggled to find counselors and thought about the great leaders who served before, and all these sweet girls for whom I am in some way responsible for. In Jacob 4:7 it says, "Nevertheless, the Lord God showeth us our weakness that we may know that it is by his grace, and his great condescensions unto the children of men, that we have power to do these things." I know better than anyone else that by myself I am not capable of doing what is required of me. But I also know that if I do the things that will bring the Spirit into my life, and take my concerns to the Lord, and follow the directions I am given, he will magnify my efforts and miracles will happen. He has done it before. And it will serve as a further testimony to me of his power and his ability to work miracles regardless of how inadequate his servant is.

Big Girl

Macy is so stinking cute. She got her first tooth and her first ponytail on the same day. It is crazy how you can't wait for their hair to be long enough to stick a stupid rubber band in it. I love how she has started pointing at things and people, and I love the way she tries to make conversation with her little noises. I love how she always smells like food. Chelsey is always a little grossed out if she has a touch of food in her hair, but seriously Chelsey, do you see what I'm dealing with....at least four or five times a day? When I finally get her all cleaned up, it's just about time to feed her again! That is the story of motherhood (i.e. dishes, laundry, cleaning, cooking...as soon as you feel like you got on top of everything, it is ready to be done again). Anyway, she is so sweet. Yesterday when I got her up from her nap, she just hugged me and gave me loves for about five minutes. It was the best part of my day. I love being a mom.