Down Time

Our nights are usually crazy trying to fit everything in before bedtime so the kids don't wake up tired. The other night was such a blessing though. We had about an hour where we were just chilling. I was sitting on the couch, Carston snuggled up so he could tell me about his day, the girls were dancing to some sweet tunes. Even Kate was joining in, trying to spin and put her arms out pretty like she was one of the big girls. Pretty soon, Carston was showing us the steps he was learning in school (one, two, three, bow...One, two, three, stop). Then it turned into Avery and Carston dancing together and me showing them some basic lifts (John was wondering if he needed to step in at this point, but the look on my face was enough to tell him he had better not :). It was just so nice. One of those nights where I look around, surrounded by people I love more than life, and realize how blessed I am. I wish I could have bottled up the evening and saved it to enjoy again and again.

Miss Kate Leaves Zero Behind

I can't believe that Kate is one today. I know everyone already says it, but time seems to fly by the more kids we have. I am so grateful for this sweet little girl. She is so good tempered and just goes with the flow in our crazy, busy house. I'm constantly having to wake her up early from naps, throw her in the car, make her skip naps completely, and she just rolls with it, always waking up with her cute dimpled smile. I remember a year ago when she was born. We didn't find out if she was a girl or a boy. Both my mom and I had bought lots of newborn boy clothes, so when I pulled her out and saw she was a girl, I was VERY surprised. We brought her home to a house full of sick kids, kept her locked away in our room for the first month while I changed clothes every time I went to take care of her :) It was quite an adventure for me! But I'm so grateful we get to have her as part of our family. She has blessed my life since the time she shared my body with me :) Here are some things to know about Kate:
1. She has the cutest dimpled smile, and she is never slow to share it.
2. She thinks it's fun to laugh along with anyone who's giggling-Macy and her were cracking up at the fish at the doctor's office the other day :)
3. Whenever John is wrestling with the kids, she heads over as fast as she can to join in the fun.
4. She LOVES sneaking into Macy's room and crawling up on her bed (much to Macy's dismay if she's in there: "NOOOO KATE! NOOOO! MOMMY KATE'S GETTING IN MY BED!)
5. If the gate to the stairs is ever left open, she bolts over as fast as she can to crawl down. She gives herself away though because she gets so excited and starts laughing :)
6. She is still a big baby: 24 lbs. (88th percentile) and 31.25 inches (97th). She has also decided to follow in the footsteps of her siblings and join the "head-size off the charts" club :)
7. She is a snuggler. She has been giving hugs forever. I love it :)
8. She is constantly moving around, getting into cupboards, pulling clothes out of drawers, spreading napkins all over the floor, taking all the movies out, etc.
9. She often stops in the midst of her roaming to find me for a quick snuggle. Then she's off and crawling again.
10. She is currently walking 1/2 the time and crawling 1/2 the time. She gets excited when she's walking (which can sometimes cause her to fall), but she often resorts to crawling when she's in a hurry to get somewhere.
11. She likes to growl :)
12. She actually pets our dog Sadie. Literally pets her instead of "petting" which involves mauling and poking eyes out.
13. She gets super excited when we go to Grandma's and starts giggling when we're going up the walk.
14. She is currently trying to master the sippy cup and often exclaims in frustration when it won't come out because she isn't holding it high enough.
15. She'll play with actual toys only as a last resort. She'd much rather spend her time investigating other things.
16. She shares a room with Carston, and he usually prays that she won't cry in the night (she did that a lot over Christmas when she was sick :)
17. Much to my liking, she has remained a Kate, and not a Katie (although I think Macy slips that one in every so often :)
18. She likes to help herself when she's hungry. She usually smells like pretzels because she can most easily get to those in the pantry.
19. She LOVES taking baths. She likes to lay stomach down, push herself up on her arms with her legs straight out, and rock back and forth.
20. She is obsessed with getting a hold of John's toothbrush.
21. Her middle name is Leta in honor of my Grandma Gladys (Leta means "Glad," even Grandma would have been opposed to using Gladys :)
22. We love her so much and can't imagine our life without her sweet little spirit.

Late Christmas Pictures...

Our last surprise from Christmas...our new doggie Sadie. I owe it all to my friend Micaela :) She came over this summer and told me about her prompting for her daughter of, "She needs a dog." Avery seems unable to get enough snuggles, so I'd been praying about that for a while. The phrase, "She needs a dog." would not leave my mind, so I jumped on board :) We looked long and hard to find the right dog for our family. It wasn't easy with all the requirements. We needed a dog, not a puppy because Mommy has no time to train one with all the other munchkins she's training. We needed one that didn't require 1-2 hour walks (I don't know how those dogs find the right home). We needed one that would be gentle with all our kids, especially little Miss Kate. I wanted one that would bark to alert visitors-or more importantly strangers-but not one that barked incessantly. One who didn't shed too much would be a plus as well. Anyway, we scoured the ads online (I can't believe how many dogs, especially puppies, are out there). We even went to an animal shelter, but it was too hard to get a feel for the dogs since they were in such a strange environment. Finally, we found one on KSL, so I sent them an email as quick as I could. The family had so many responses they removed the ad within a few hours. They decided to let their 12 year old daughter pick the family, and we were her first pick! We took Kate over and met her, and we felt like she'd be a good fit. She is a good dog, and I'm grateful she's now a part of our family. She likes to sleep and cuddle up with Avery, she cleans up after Kate when she eats, she plays with Carston, etc. We probably have a few more weeks of adjusting, and we want to fine tune her training so she can have more freedom, but we are pretty happy with things. I think it was a good choice not only for Avery, but our whole family.

Avery and her snuggle buddy-3 year old Sadie

Kate likes to pet Sadie and try to steal her food. They have a lot in common :)

Macy was all tuckered out after celebrating Christmas. That's what happens when you run on full speed every waking moment :)

Carston loved his ninja costume and video game :) He also got a video camera so I'll have to start posting some of his things :)

First Surgery in the Family

(Sorry it is blurry-it's a phone picture)
So after everything we've been through the last 3 years with Avery's ears, she went in this morning and had tubes put in. I'm so filled with gratitude for Heavenly Father, for him guiding and directing us as we prepared her so she would be able to be calm and unafraid (she does not have a good track record relating to anything medical). I feel like John and I were also guided with the various decisions we had to make throughout this journey, and we were able to feel peace. I was really impressed with the Utah Valley Hospital. The had a great program we went to a few days before for kids who were having surgery. Avery got a hospital doll that she drew a face on, they took her through all the steps she'd go through when she had her tubes put in. I know if we didn't go to that, it would have been another story entirely. She was so composed and cooperative this morning-there were no tears and no cries for her mommy. She told me after that she was a little shy there, but overall, everyone there made her feel so special. I'm grateful for that. I guess it is common for doctors to recommend an adnoidectomy when kids get tubes, but John and I decided against that, and I feel good about that decision. It would have made the surgery a much bigger deal than it was.

I kind of had a hard time when I realized that we were out of options and Avery would need the tubes. She has been struggling with her ears for about three years. Throughout all that time, John and I prayed a lot about what we should do, routes we should take, etc. We tried several different things, and they'd work for a time, but the trouble would always return. I never wanted to do the tubes though, and I knew people thought I was crazy, but I just never felt like we should. So when we found ourselves on this path, it was hard for me. It made me doubt my ability to be in tune, recognize, and follow the promptings of the Spirit. I wondered if it was my own fears that had pushed me away from tubes rather than the Spirit. If that was the case, then what kind of a parent was I? Over the last few days though as I have studied the scriptures, the Lord as truly blessed me. I feel like I was guided to study the things I did so the Spirit could speak peace to my heart. I first read about Nephi obtaining the plates. Here was a very righteous man, and I'm sure he was praying for guidance as he sought to obtain the plates from Nephi. But he didn't reach the objective on the first attempt. He didn't even reach it on the second attempt. Was it because he couldn't recognize the Spirit? Of course not. But there were other purposes that needed to be accomplished, other objectives he did not understand, that were accomplished through his failed attempts. Another day I was studying about the early saints of the church. They relocated at least four times before they found a place of refuge. I'm sure everyone was praying that they'd be led to the right place. And yet, even as they were being led, they weren't immediately led to Salt Lake. There was a reason why the Lord led them to the other places first, even if those places did not offer the sanctuary they were seeking. The last thing I read about was Zion's Camp. It was organized with the purpose being to help the persecuted saints seek redress and recover their property. They traveled almost 1000 miles, suffered hunger, thirst, fatigue...And in the end, when they reached the saints, they were disbanded. So, did that mean that the Lord did not lead them to organize the camp? No. To those who were a part of it, they thought the purpose was to help the saints, but the Lord had another purpose unrelated to that. It prepared many of those involved to lead and guide the saints to the Salt Lake Valley.
I don't understand why I was guided to try all these other things for Avery's ears, when in the end, none of them were the final solution. But I do trust that I was guided, that there are purposes and reasons I do not know about or understand, and I'm so grateful for the insights and comfort I've received this past week as I've studied the scriptures. I know that is one of the most powerful ways for the Spirit to speak to our hearts. I'm grateful for a Heavenly Father who loves me, and watches over me and my family. I am so blessed.

I'm so glad I'm not the last one to post about December and all its festivities :) It seems like my life continues to get busier and busier (I guess that's what happens when I keep popping out kids :) but I really do love almost every minute of it and want to remember all these sweet moments with my family. I was awful about getting out the camera this year though, and I vow not to do that again because the pictures are what trigger my memories. I do need to let myself off the hook a little bit because I was dealing with a sick baby the week of Christmas. I'm the awful mom whose baby threw up at the Christmas Eve party where 50 of John's relatives were gathered. I was impressed with myself for holding back the tears long enough until I got home. I felt so bad knowing that everyone would be pretty upset if their kids woke up puking on Christmas. No one wants that. I've got the best sister-in-law though who sent me a sweet text telling me not to worry. Little kindnesses truly do go a long way. Anyway here is my catch up :) And I still have a few more to come...hopefully.

December to Remember

Things to Remember

-Staying home on Christmas day
-Doing the puzzle I missed last year
-Carston complaining that no one else had to do Math homework over the break
-Sledding with all the kids
-John's "sledding" hill in the front that is taller than he is
-Macy saying, "Oh Thank You Mommy! Thank You!" after opening each present
-How Avery was so excited to play Mary in the nativity. She had her little grin on for the whole thing.
-Our Christmas tree ending up bare for the bottom three feet because we had to keep moving all the ornaments out of Kate's reach
-Performing surgery on Avery's gingerbread house as a last resort to keep it together (we did succeed!)
-Black Friday shopping by myself from 11 that night until 8 the next morning
-John pushing me straight to bed and letting me sleep until late afternoon when I returned :)
-Sick little Kate, so sad to see her devoid of all energy and strength
-The pile of laundry that never ended as a result of all Kate's vomit and poop :)
-Avery's ear rupturing again, me feeling like the worst mom, and finally calling the ENT
-Arranging our Christmas surprise
-John getting mad at me because I kept saying, "Let's not get each other any more presents...we already bought the freezer and saw" (maybe I am a bigger scrooge than I want to admit)
-Candy cane cookies-and me once again wondering why I always pick such labor intensive ones for the cookie party (they were good though!)
-Realizing half-way to Salt Lake that I forgot the stroller for my field trip to the Children's Museum with all 4 kids by myself (we survived-thanks Micaela for the tickets). I also lost my parking ticket before making it out of the garage. Apparently I've lost part of my mind as well.
-The Lord helping me do things that did not come naturally in order to serve a loved one
-Probably the only Christmas (past and future) we had a good present for my Dad
-Making the big Christmas breakfast myself because Mom was gone. Luckily John and Randy were there to help out.
-A Sunday birthday. Not the most exciting day for a birthday. John tried his best, but there isn't a whole lot you can do.
-My kids wanting to know where the decorations were for my birthday, when I was going to open my presents, what about my cake, and when were my friends coming over for my party
-Me deciding that as much as I hate disappointing my kids, I did not want to clean up decorations, I already opened John's present, I did not feel like making my own birthday cake, and my family, i.e. my friends, were all out of town so they better not get too excited about a party :)
-Kate getting the raisins out of the pantry, prying the lid off, and helping herself
-Carston's internal battle between wanting to read before bed but not wanting to give up all the fun late-night activities abundant in December
-Carston being in heaven because the 1/2 hour electronic allotment went out the window for Christmas break
-Mom going crazy because of all the electronic time going on!
-Lots of singing and practicing with the Laurels
-WAY too much sweets and candy sitting around the house

I want to add more, but I'm out of time...maybe later :)

Miss Independent

Macy decided she's not waiting for Mommy to catch a break in her schedule. She's going to do the potty training all on her own.

Avery's Dance Class

Avery's dance class had a day where parents could come and see what they did each day in class. It was so much fun to watch her. I love not knowing how my kids will act when it is their first time doing something. Like Avery and her Primary Program. She went up to the mic to do her part and just stood there for a while looking around. We didn't know if she'd spit it out, if someone would try to help her and she'd bury her head, or what. She ended up spitting it out so cute on her own :) Anyway, right below is a picture of her and her buddy Ava. Ava is pretty serious when it comes to dance, she's afraid to do anything wrong and gets anxious if she thinks she messed up. Avery vacillates between being a leader and a follower. In dance class, she tends to follow Ava's lead. At the end of each class each girl is supposed to have a time to dance all by herself showing her "favorite steps." Ava has always refused and Avery follows her example. They just barely did it for the first time (probably because the teacher let them do it together :) Needless to say, I was curious to see what she'd do when everyone was watching. She did just fine, doing all her steps, no tears when she stumbled. I loved the little grin on her face when they did their jumps. One of the other highlights was John doing the "Obstacle Course" with her. I think he missed his calling as a ballerino. He definitely showed enthusiasm. I told him it wasn't right to steal the spotlight from the little girls. Anyway, I love Avery. I can understand more how my parents lasted through the HUNDREDS of hours of dance recitals.

Sunday before Christmas

I thought Avery looked adorable. All my kids did, but this Sunday was even busier than usual so the only picture I snapped was in the changing room :) This year, I led the Laurels in planning a special Christmas program to share with all the youth. It was a lot of work and practice, but I was really happy with how it turned out. We highlighted people involved in the Savior's birth. The Laurels researched their person and then wrote a few paragraphs about that person, what it would have been like, what we could learn from their example. After each person shared their thoughts, we had a song for each person's perspective. I found some really beautiful songs. I shared some thoughts at the end about the examples of the people present that night. Would we have responded as they did, or would we have missed out because we allowed various things to hold us back. We also talked about giving a gift to the Savior. You know, many times, it can be hard to fulfill and magnify my calling. It is a huge time commitment and it can be hard to balance the needs of my family. It is also hard emotionally sometimes. I love these girls so much, and when they are struggling or face difficult challenges, there is a weight upon my shoulders that I cannot shake and that brings me to tears. But it is worth it. Times like this program, when I know that hearts have been touched, that they have been pushed closer to the Savior, it's amazing. I know I'm a better person because of the work I've been honored to do. Anyway here are some cool songs we used:
Breath of Heaven
Joseph's Lullaby
Bethlehem Dawn
One King
If I Had Been in Bethlehem

Bye-Bye Grandpa and Grandma

This Christmas was pretty different for me and my family. Each year, John and I try to respectfully split time between our two families. I am definitely a family girl, and I struggled in the past to miss any part of "My family's" Christmas (or any other holiday's) festivities. It took 7 years of Christmas Eve before I found myself tear-free and reasonably patient for the party with his side to end. Well, this year brought a first. This was the first Christmas that we didn't have either my Grandma or Grandpa with us. It has been pretty hard not having them as a part of our lives (I'm bawling just writing this). But it has of course been the hardest for my mom. It turned out that Heather would have to stay in Texas this year, Chelsey would be there with her in-laws, and we all thought it would be a blessing for my mom to have this Christmas in a different setting. So my parents and brother went there for Christmas. The night before they left, we had a little party with them. My mom gave them some cute PJ's and slippers, we watched a movie, and just had a lot of fun. I am so grateful for my parents. I know I am so blessed to have such loving, unselfish, good people to call mom and dad. Just today my mom took Avery for most of the day, let her run errands with her, and just made her feel so special. And my sweet Dad spent hours putting together their Christmas presents. My parents would do anything for me without hesitation. I love them.

Here's miss Kate. She found the Marshmellows later and helped herself :)

My little fireball!

Avery's excited to have something else to love :)

Gotta love Macy's mood swings!